Greystones Garda Trial Sing-Along Sirens

Taxi for A. Fecker!

s the Garda siren becomes as regular around Greystones as yoga farts at The Cove, the local boys and girls in blue have hit on a way to bring some light relief to the town.

By having their sirens play popular hits of yesteryear and today so people can sing-along.

And forget all about other people’s troubles.

“We’ve had a lot of complaints lately about our sirens ringing out across Greystones pretty much day and night,” says Garda Les Shirriam, “Especially from the older generation, who suddenly find they no longer live in a sleepy seaside town but slap-dab in the middle of Grand Theft Auto: Vice City.”

“The sharp rise in population has led to a sharp rise in crime,” explains Garda Maria Ciorraithe, “and that means a big rise in the use of our sirens. It only makes sense that we should try and make that emergency wail a little bit more enjoyable for people – by introducing a little crime karaoke…”

Already on the Garda siren jukebox are hits such as Johnny Cash’s Fulsom Prison Blues, Judas Priest’s Breaking The Law, the Supergrass fave Caught By The Fuzz and voted no.1 by the Greystones Garda, The Clash’s take on the 1960s hit I Fought The Law.

“The important thing to remember about that Clash song,” says Shirriam, “is that the next line is, ‘And the law won…’. There’s a lesson there for everyone.”

Sorely aware that around Greystones, not all fun lovin’ criminals are old enough to remember many of the songs being given a siren makeover, The Prodigy’s Firestarter has also been included.

“For very obvious reasons,” says Ciorraithe. “But there are also songs that we immediately banned from ever being played on our sirens…

“Songs such as Bob Marley’s I Shot The Sheriff, Jackson’s Smooth Criminal and Thin Lizzy’s Jailbreak.

“We also voted unanimously for an Ed Sheeran ban. Just because…”

With the sing-along sirens being phased in over the coming weeks, the hope is that, smiles Shirriam, all of Wicklow’s squad cars will unite to close this year’s series of Garda band summer concerts along the Bray seafront.

“By then, all going well, we should have worked out the harmonies for our unofficial anthem, The Police’s De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da…”