Despite the fact that his parents are both butt-ugly, somehow, two years ago this week, two wrongs made an incredibly beautiful baby in River Thompson.
Where exactly he got his stubbornness from though, we can’t be sure.
All we needed was River to hold the precious heart-shaped My Greystones stone for, ooh, 0.5 of a second – depending on the aperture – but, be the holy, the little maypuck was having none of it.
By the end of our five minutes of cajoling, cavorting and crying, that stone must have hit just about every square foot of that room.
Even taking River outside to witness his fine fizzog being used for a friend’s storage and removal van didn’t impress the toddler enough to romance the stone.
So, we settled on that one clear shot. Even though River isn’t actually looking at the camera. Still looks like just about the most beautiful kid who ever graced Elvis’ green earth.
Given that we hardly know the kid, thankfully – with a little help from his parents, Phil and Ann –River (who landed on this earth on February 15th, 2016) has written his own little bio…
The past two years have been a blast. Nearly every day, I’ve had my picture taken, as mama is a photographer. It’s kinda like living with the paparazzi.
I’ve had no choice but to travel a lot too, as mama and dada are always on the move. My first foreign trip was to Cork, where my mama is from. Still don’t know what language they speak. Then, when I was only one, I went on a plane to Nashville and Florida, trying in vain to make America great again. I took my first steps there, which was the next best thing.
I wasn’t long home before we were off again, this time to Italy. Venice, in fact, where all the cars are underwater, and there are far too many bridges. A few months after that, and I was jetting off to Majorca, for some sun, sea, sand, and annoyingly brasive sunscreen.
Since then, I’ve settled down a bit, and stuck to home shores. My two favourite clubs in Greystones are Gymboree Music in St Patrick’s Church on Friday mornings and Tumble Tots on Thursdays in Shoreline. Until the town gets a nightclub again, these will tide me over nicely…
It’s always the sweet-looking ones that you have to watch. Now, where the hell did that stone go…?
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