“The way it works for me, buddy, is, I’ve been around the world – Switzerland, England, you name it – and I’ve been around for quite a bit TOO – 14 years and counting – so, I know what I like. And I know where I like it.
“And all my travels and wisdom have led me here, to sunny Greystones. Love the place. I head down here with my pet, Mary-Ann, and we just cover the whole seafront. When I can keep up with the young whipper-snapper, that is.
“And the great thing about the Greystones seafront is that you never know what you might find to eat. There must be some goat in my family tree, because I’ll eat pretty much anything. Including seaweed. Very good for the digestive system, seaweed. Every time I eat it, Mary-Ann just about throws up.
“Nothing much else to tell you, other than I’m a stunning labrador, and I’m happily spoilt, with a walk down to the sea every day. Oh, and whoever said that having a dog’s life means times are tough was a complete eejit.
“A dog’s life is, well, the dog’s bo**ox.”